Aug 06, 2014

My brother is a journalist, working and living in Russia. He does proffer a different view on what is happening in the Ukraine than the stories we get over here. However, if we do take at face value what has been said in our press about the stymied investigation, and recovery efforts of the victims of flight MH-17, we see what happens when diplomacy is brought in to deal with those who have have different values, goals and interests in life. Whilst the MH-17 situation is very sad, deplorable, and no laughing matter, every time I hear a news article about the diplomatic “urging” of the Ukraine and rebel forces to allow the recovery/investigation team access to the site, I can’t help thinking of an episode on Working Dog’s ‘Hollowmen’ (the guys responsible for ‘The Castle’), where they have a diplomatic issue and they are asking for advice on how to deal with a foreign country. What ensues is a humorous examination of the nuances in the connotation of words, what words should be used in what circumstances, and the possible implications of those words in foreign affairs. The current situation had me thinking about playing politics in offices and the words we might employ at that time. There is a breakdown of the communication process that is commonly used by trainers in the communication space. It ascribes only 7% of the total communication process to words in face-to-face situations. The other 93% goes to body language and tone. This breakdown comes from the work of an Armenian born Psychologist, Albert Mehrabian, currently an Emeritus Professor at UCLA. Mehrabian did his study in 1965 and since then, says he has been misquoted in his results since that time. The study was only conducted on women and was more around personal or familial communication. Words hold connotations and connotations create meaning. So, whilst there definitely is importance in our tone and body language, our choice of words can play a crucial role in the messages we send. Consider the difference between referring to someone as “old” versus “mature” or the vagueness of “we have a communication issue” as opposed to “staff seem to misinterpret my verbal messages.” Certain trigger words such as “no,” “but” or “unfortunately” used at the wrong time or in the wrong way can break rapport as much as poor tone or body language can. Here are five ideas to consider in word choice. Use words that are:

1. Context appropriate – use “mature” versus “old” or carefully chosen words that land with your audience.
2. Concrete – “communication” is a very abstract word whereas “verbal messages” is more concrete.
3. Familiar – the objective of communicating in business is to get a message received and understood first and foremost; using uncommon words can create misunderstanding and separate you from your audience (this includes jargon).
4. Inclusive – be considerate of gender, age, disability, etc.
5. Current – clichés can quickly date and separate generations.

If you want a laugh, away from the tragedy of MH-17 and other awful circumstances currently being played out in the world, check out that episode of the Hollowmen.